LHB Blog

A girl, a blog and a cactus named Pudding

Category: Soups (Page 2 of 2)

Mushroom Soup

Alternative title: I had a fridge full of mushrooms…And when life gives you mushrooms, you make mushroom-ade…What do you mean that’s not the proverb?

 

“Are these mushrooms that special funky kind of mushroom?” My brain queried.

“Sorry?” I mutter while slicing the vegetables.

“These mushrooms…Are they going to make you all peculiar like when your friend S took them in that weird caravan she was stopping in?” S had called me that particular day to explain how the toaster had suddenly started laughing maniacally at her. That toaster was, apparently, a bit of a prick.

“No, they aren’t magic mushrooms…They are just normal mushrooms…The bathroom walls won’t start melting, grains of rice won’t become sentient and a giant wooden fish won’t suddenly start reciting Shakespeare” I explained with a sigh.

“So…What’s the point in them?”

“Lunch. That’s the point. A nice, nutritious lunch”.

“I’d rather be compared to a Summer’s day by a salmon made of oak”

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Leek and Potato Soup with Chilli and Ginger

Alternative title: I need to pay more bloody attention when making more than one soup at a time otherwise everything gets tipped into the pan and I wonder why the hell there are red bits floating in a supposedly chilli-free soup.

 

“Did I tip chilli and ginger in this?” I ask, glaring at the red in the pan.

“You fricking idiot…” my brain answers.

“I know, I know…Damn it!” my attention had been on the butternut squash recipe.

“It’s a good job you’re not a scientist or you’d be a danger to mankind…” my brain is tutting at me now.

“You do realise that Alexander Fleming only discovered Penicillin by accident right?” I argue.

“He was a scruffy git who didn’t bother to clean his laboratory – That’s how he discovered Penicillin”

1-0 brain…1-0.

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Roasted Butternut Squash Soup with Chilli and Ginger

Alternative title: I think the original was bloody long enough don’t you?! By ‘eck!

 

“What the hell is that?” my brain asked.

“It’s a butternut squash” I answered while trying to select a knife.

“A what?!” my brain is suddenly suspicious.

“It’s like a pumpkin, just more…”

“Phallic?”

“No…Well…Yes, yes it is” I had to concede that did indeed, look a bit like a penis.

Freud would have a field day studying that shit!”

“…”

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