Spoonie – LHB Blog

I, Fidget

On May 16, 2017

Alternative title: I like to move it, move it … I like to move it, move it … I like to FIDGET! Ok so that’s a total lie, I hate to fidget, but it seems to be my body’s automatic reaction to, well, pretty much anything! That pose that you do in yoga when you just lie on the floor (the rather happily named “Corpse Pose“), yep my toes are fussing in my little yoga socks. Watching that light-hearted comedy about hitting rock bottom before rising like the proverbial phoenix with fart jokes, yep I’m biting the skin around my nails.

I can’t seem to stop fidgeting, in fact I’m pretty sure I even fidget in my sleep! I know I certainly grind my teeth in my sleep as I wake up with a jaw aching worse than the time I thought I could defeat one of those giant gob stoppers in my youth (swear those things were just rocks coated in sugary shit).

Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder

On March 2, 2017

In Mental Health, Spoonie

Alternative title: Otherwise known as Anankastic Personality Disorder … Rolls right off the tongue that doesn’t it?

Back in early February I mentioned the meeting I had with my Psych Doc in which he cheerfully informed me that as well as having Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) I also have Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD). They sound the same, but believe me when I say they’re not … They are two distinct disorders that in some instances can have co-morbid relationships.

Totally not one to do things by halves me!

Clomipramine and Me

On February 16, 2017

In Mental Health, Spoonie

Alternative title: Listen to your body!

As I mentioned last week there has been a switch around with regards to my medication following my recent diagnosis of Anankastic Personality Disorder (also known as Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder – OCPD) and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD). I came off Mirtazapine without issue (except for not being able to sleep properly) and promptly started the Clomipramine.

Four days later I called my Psych Doc’s office in tears – the pressure in my head was intense, pain surging throughout my skull attacking whatever it came into contact with. I felt sick, I was sick. I stopped eating, I couldn’t manage even a glass of water. I had uncontrollable tremors. A jaw aching from being clenched, a grinding of teeth. I felt dizzy. I couldn’t sleep … And my Anxiety was kicking me when I was down with a heavy chest, prickly arms and the unrelenting feelings of panic and dread.

Something was wrong.

Introducing the Psychiatry Doctor

On February 7, 2017

In Mental Health, Spoonie

Alternative title: My Mental Health has thrown me down shit creek (again) without a paddle, or boat … Or even a sodding life jacket! My brain has kicked and screamed and bellyached at every opportunity (over the slightest of things) … And yet to many, I seem completely in control.

One of the few that does know that I’m suffering, is my new Psych Doc (Dr. C) as during our first meeting I was in floods of tears because my brain was telling me that I needed to check the handbrake on the car (for the 10th … 11th … 12th time!) and that by being in the waiting room I was being negligent and that someone would get hurt (they might even die!) and it would be all my fault … I’d already been back to my car twice and ready to dash for a third time when my name was called.

LHB Blog

A girl, a blog and a cactus named Pudding

Category: Spoonie (Page 1 of 11)

I, Fidget

Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder

Clomipramine and Me

Introducing the Psychiatry Doctor

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