Alternative title: When your brain is telling you that all it wants to do on a beautifully sunny day is lie in bed and pretend the day doesn’t exist … You lie and tell it you’re going out for ice cream.
Brain: “You’re lying to me … We never go on the motorway to get ice-cream. Turn the car around and take me home right now!”
Me: “Wind your neck in, we’re going to spend a bit of time with nature”.
Brain: “Turn the damned car around this second! Don’t make me barf all up in this place!”
Me: “Would you rather we had our butt-hole bleached?!”
Brain: “Is that even a thing?! Why would you even -”
Butt: “Oh hell no! You have got to be kidding me! There is not a chance that -”
Me: “I have the beautician on speed dial … Just an FYI”