LHB Blog

A girl, a blog and a cactus named Pudding

Tag: Fortitude (Page 1 of 3)

Roasted Pepper Soup

Alternative title: In which I find a rather demonic looking roasted pepper and consider repenting my sins…Until I realise that the sun will probably supernova before I finish listing them all…Sigh.


“Why are you making something you don’t like?” my brain huffed.

“What do you mean?” I rubbed my eyes and cursed the onion.

“Well, you freaking hate pepper…Why are you making a pepper soup?”

“You’re thinking of a different type of pepper” I mutter.

“…huh?” my brain was rather befuddled.

“You’re thinking of peppercorns, a seasoning, part of the Piperaceae family…We’re using Bell and Chiquino peppers, which are called Capsicum and part of the Nightshade fam-”

“Nightshade? … Are you bonkers?!”

This is the genius I live with.

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Spicy Buttery Chickpea and Split Red Lentil Soup

Alternative title: I can’t seem to cook lentils without hearing Neil from “The Young Ones” bellowing “guys! There’s some dinner on the floor if you want it!”… Being raised on a comedy series like that is probably the reason I’m a sarcastic git.


“What…The heck…Are they?” My brain mumbled.

“Split red lentils” I mutter as I tear open the bag, lentils spill on to the counter top…over the counter top…Into the pup’s bowl. Pup looks decidedly unimpressed.


“Yes lentils…”

“And you’re going to mix them with chickpeas? By ‘eck we’ll be farting like mad!”


I blame ‘The Young Ones!’

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Chocolate Banana Smoothie

Alternative title: Dearest Raw Cacao…Where the fudge have you been all my life?!


Last Saturday I had far too much gin to drink (a rarity for me being a near teetotaller!)…I could blame Edinburgh Gin for creating an amazing beverage that tastes just like jam (no I’m not kidding you! Raspberry, fricking, jam…but gin!), or I could blame George Boyd for his amazing goal that propelled Burnley to a very important win over Man City (if you haven’t seen it…It was bloody stunning!). Whatever the reason, I woke up on Sunday morning expecting a really bad noggin…But the bad noggin didn’t happen, what did happen was an epic sweet tooth attack! I’m talking a major “I will throw an absolute hissy fit if I don’t get sugar!” sweet tooth moment.

Instead of raiding the chocolates I had bought my mum for Mother’s Day and subsequently feeling like an utter turd-bag, I decided to open the bag of raw cacao powder I had purchased after creating the chocolate and chia seed energy bites.

I then decided against just shoveling it by hand straight into my pie-hole and opted to whip up a smoothie instead.

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Chocolate and Chia Seed Energy Bites

Alternative title: My sweet tooth has been throwing a right hissy fit recently to the point that the mere sight of carrot sticks makes me want to throw a major temper tantrum of my own.


“Is that chocolate?!” My brain shrieked.

“Is that chocolate?!” My sweet tooth shrieked.

“Yes it’s chocolate” I shrieked as the lid of the tub fell onto the counter-top, a light dusting of cocoa powder now covered just about every surface between my kitchen and the backside of the country. Happens every darned time!

“Get a spoon…Any spoon will do…” My brain yelled.

“Stuff the spoon, get a ladle! I don’t care if there is mushroom soup on it just get the ruddy ladle!” My sweet tooth yelled back.

I seriously need to separate those two…

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