“Ruebi, you can’t pick a TV series based on the actor that is in it” my friend said.
“Says who? With the amount of rubbish being produced for TV now I need an incentive to pick a show” I wiggled the remote at the TV.
“Pick it based on the storyline or at least the title”.
“Storyline? You look up a storyline for any programme now and you get to know everything from who the murderer is to what colour socks the old lady in the corner shop was wearing when she accidentally guffed, have they never heard of spoilers? And if the decision was based on titles, would you watch ‘The Strain‘ (because I’d assume this was a medical documentary about extreme cases of constipation) or ‘The Leftovers‘ (in which Gordon Ramsay investigates restaurant bins) or even ‘Chasing Shadows‘ (it would be some nobber trying to stalk his shadow along the beach at Blackpool until the sun went down…there’d be seagull turds and fake tits blowing in the breeze)”
You switch the TV on in the evening and guaranteed there is some reality nonsense with people singing, dancing, cleaning houses that look like junkyards or eating animal penises…or there is the multitude of soap operas to make you feel like everything is futile (seriously, no one is ever happy in those things). That said, daytime TV isn’t any better. I get that it is easy on the noggin after a long day at work, I get that some people may find it entertaining to watch a minor celebrity balk on blended testicles or endearing to watch some poor soul bleach the hell out of a sink for 30 minutes. Really, I do understand because we all need time to unwind and just escape from reality for a bit.
But, these shows make me a little bit potty if I’m subjected to them for too long. I end up sitting in a corner facing the wall wondering why oh why I wasted two hours of my life watching someone call someone else a “slllaaaaaaaggggg” as though the Viz comic had never gone out of fashion when I can just nip into the town centre with a bag of popcorn on a Saturday night and watch it first hand. I also get confused by who is sleeping with whom and why they haven’t all been tested at the clap clinic…though I suppose that would be one very awkward hour long episode with a lot of wobbly cam moments focused on the pile of magazines on the table dating back to 1963.
So I pick most of the TV series I watch based upon actors, writers or directors I like…This rule has served me well, for the most part. It doesn’t work when applied to movies though; I watched ‘Hairspray‘ purely because I adore Christopher Walken…It was all kinds of awful…I just…I can’t relive that right now…Oh gods the horror!
My brain is a swirling shit storm of TV/film knowledge. For example, when ‘Hannibal‘ came on the scene:
Me: “I should watch this because the movies were pretty good”
Brain: “No, you should watch this because Bryan Fuller is involved. You remember him don’t you? He did ‘Dead Like Me‘ and ‘Pushing Daisies‘…Also there is Hettienne Park, we watched her on stage that time in New York so it would be interesting to see her in this role and remember the evil dude from Casino Royale? The one with the gammy eye? Yeah, Mads Mikkelsen, he’s in it. AND…”
Me: “Ok, ok, geez. Wind your neck in, we’ll watch it”.
Brain: “…there will be food”.
Me: “Made of people…He is a cannibal after all”
Brain: “…ummmm people food”
Me: “…you’re scary you know that?”
Strangely my brain was right, that series does make me hungry.
Anyway, I stand by my decision to watch ‘The Leftovers’ simply because I like Eccleston, afterall he was the Ninth Doctor (which strangely is the only reason I liked my last visit to church), so when his name comes up for a series I will happily try it. It has nothing to do with the fact he is a fellow Northerner…*ahem*
Come on readers, which actors will you watch in just about anything?